99

This child thinks I am 99.

Being the oldest of seven kids, I often wonder how they view me. I obviously didn't have older siblings (unless you count my parents...who are closer to me in age than the guitar hero posted here) so I sort of missed out on the sibling cushion my younger counterparts enjoy.

My youngest bro was born whilst I was in college, so it was always a concern of mine that he would think of me as an aunt, and not a sister. Luckily he rocks and we get to hang out often enough that he knows whats what. He's super smart and a total badass. His only weakness is his age (five) which we all use to our advantage whenever possible. (I recently convinced him we have a fourth sister named Lafonda who has 11 cats and lives "across town." My trusty family has been keeping that story alive in my absence which is fantastic.)

The point of all this, assuming I even have one, is that it is stange to be considered daily by a toddler. He recently saw a commercial targeted for old people and told my stepmom about it because he thought she, my sister and I could benefit from it, as the product was allegedly marketed for people "99 or older."

My greatest fascination with this story is wondering what the hell could possibly be marketed on TV for people that old. I'm also interested in the seven decades I've missed out on.